This year’s SuperCon costumes were the result of Danika’s plot for greatness. We were all characters from Sailor Moon. She, was Princess Serenity. Her Dad, Tuxedo Mask and me…Sailor Pluto. If you know anything of these characters, you know that the Guardian dresses are very…short and tight. I knew it would be a miracle to look good in that short, white dress trimmed in black. White is never a great color for my size. It just accents all the wrong places. This was no different.
I joined a program through a crossfit gym, Crossfit Regeneration, which was a 3 month or so challenge. It was a great idea and ended just in time for Halloween when I would don this spandex fat trap and hopefully it would fit. When you order from Asia…the sizes are not always on point. It DID fit by Halloween and I wore it successfully. By the time the Con rolled around a month after Halloween, body shape wear was needed to make it look right. Despite the complications, we ended up winning the Best Novice Group for the major cosplay contest, but I was so self conscious on a main stage in front of hundreds of people with my fat screaming under layers of corset and shape wear. It didn’t help we had a horrible prop malfunction in front of hundreds of said people. Danika insists her “cuteness” got us the win and won’t let me forget it. I was mortified, but I survived.
What does this have to do with my newly selected cosplay of Katniss Everdeen from The Hunger Games? Well, since we did a character theme last year, I was ready for a little armor and some new cosplay challenges. I was ready to be an individual. I didn’t want to be subject to Danika’s cute factor and I didn’t want to shrink when displaying so much hard work by wearing my cosplay.
So, how do I pull these elements together? Katniss. She is fully clothed…in pants…and black! This avoids any of my mom tush sticking out of a too small cosplay. She looks amazing and regal in both the black and red outfits. Also, she’s a bad ass. Yes, Katniss for the win.
Now I, like Katniss, have to put in the work for the win. She’s fighting for her life and in a way, I am too. Granted, looking stellar in a black armor cosplay is not life or death, but beating my excuses and conquering my demons is. No matter what has happened to me, I am not a victim. Neither is she. She is the epitome of vulnerability and strength.
She is emotional, resilient, strong, vulnerable and self sufficient. These are all qualities I can identify in myself. Some are more dominant than others, but they are all there…and more. So, tomorrow I start a journey and volunteer myself for the game so I can finally win. So I can take myself to the next level and if I find myself on a stage, I want to shine and not shrink.
How do I get there? Our pastor held an unconventional service today where we all ate a meal among each other and talked. Trust me, it was an introvert’s nightmare, but he mentioned this year being a year of adventure. He said that part of being an adventurous person was being outside of your comfort zone. It really connected with me because most all of 2019, I have been outside of my comfort zone and I suspect it is a glimpse of things to come. The greatest achievements lie outside of your comfort zone.
So, I am preparing to be uncomfortable. I am resolved to be the best self I can be and adventure beyond where comfort limits me and into the unknown of greatness. Day one begins tomorrow and I am not sure how I will do, but I’m ready to try. I’ve abused my body with Christmas goodies and plenty of sweets so now it’s time to show it some appreciation. Its time to take an adventure.
Confessions Of A Worldly Goddess 